To Be

Let’s see...how do I begin. How about with my name. It’s Brian, and I am currently attending Graduate school at Georgetown University. I have no idea how I am going to pay my loans, or even if in today’s economically trying times going back to school is the best idea, though there is one thing that I do know.

And that is what would happen if I didn’t.

Which is that I would become a zombie, of sorts. I would shamble to work everyday, even enjoying myself for the most part, though I would not be truly content because I would see myself, in the distance of time, exactly where I am right now.

“Got no future, got no past. Here today, built to last.”
West End Boys, The Pet Shop Boys

It’s a terrible thing to see such a bleak vision of a possible future, never mind having to live with it like an old, too familiar friend.

Now, despite going to school, I could end up in the same place I am now, though it would be different in that at least I made the effort to learn new skills, and to better myself.

It’s not much, but sometimes you have to take whatever you can get.

Though that is not to say that I am implying that there is anything wrong with working for a living; but a job has to offer more than just a wage. Ideally there should be opportunities for growth, challenge, and advancement.

And it’s a major plus if you can find the job that enriches the soul while delivering those other very necessary things.

At my current job, before I moved on to a new position, that’s what I felt.

Now things are better, though I don’t think that it will last forever (I don’t like to use that phrase because the last time that I checked no one lived forever) so I have to prepare the groundwork for moving on.

It may not be today, it may not be tomorrow, but it will have to be.